Tiếng Anh Tips on improving cohesion

Thảo luận trong 'Ngoại Ngữ' bắt đầu bởi Anhqtl, 2 Tháng sáu 2021.

  1. Anhqtl

    Bài viết:
    15
    Tips

    Here are some straightforward tips – nothing too complex here at all.

    1. Try using connecting phrases and not simple words
    2. Consider how you can use vocabulary
    3. Think in paragraphs

    An example:

    Here is a sample paragraph from a student essay on: People who don't know how to work with Computers would be disadvantaged. Do you agree or not?

    Secondly, computers play a vital role in education. All academic books are generated electronically. Students are learning their subjects only through computers.computers are also useful for them to present their projects to their peers and professors. Students' progress can be tracked through computers.

    =>Commentary

    - Too bad at all.

    - A reasonable range of vocabulary and some good collocations: "Academic books" "present projects" "peers and professors" "track progress".

    BUT: Doesn't flow at all / unconnected sentences.

    =>>>An improved version

    It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university require some level of computer literacy.

    1. Openings of sentences: Phrases not words

    It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university require some level of computer literacy.

    2. Vocabulary

    It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university require some level of computer literacy.

    3. Paragraphs are wholes: Not lists

    It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university require some level of computer literacy
     
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